


Red Ice, Blue Eyes, and Purple Bruises

by shitfanficmeup



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety Attacks, Attempted Sexual Assault, Bottom Connor, Canon-Typical Violence, Connor (Detroit: Become Human) Feels Pain, Connor Deserves Happiness, Deal With It, Depression, Drug Abuse, Drug Use, First Kiss, First Time, Fluff and Angst, Getting Together, Hank Anderson Deserves Happiness, Hank Anderson is Bad at Feelings, Hurt/Comfort, I play fast and loose with android anatomy, Lingerie, M/M, MY rules, Mutual Pining, My fic, Panty Kink, Post-Canon, Red Ice (Detroit: Become Human), Sexual Content, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide, Suicide Attempt, Top Hank, no beta we die like men
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-07
Updated: 2018-08-17
Packaged: 2019-06-23 01:52:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 14,800
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15595602
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shitfanficmeup/pseuds/shitfanficmeup
Summary: Post-revolution, Connor is struggling with his new-found emotions and finding a purpose. Hank tries to help Connor but how can you help somebody who doesn't want to help themselves? Especially when you're not great at helping yourself in the first place.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This fic has some "facts" in it that may not be canon-compliant. Not sorry. My fic, my rules. Trying my best. ***Please read the tags!*** This fic has attempted sexual assault, violence, and drug use!! Please do not read if any of this is upsetting to you! Stay safe.

Every step on the wet pavement made the hard heel of Connor’s dress shoe echo through the cool night air. As he aimlessly walked through the trash-littered streets of Detroit, he looked for a place to stay for the night. An empty building, an abandoned car, maybe another friendly-looking deviant. 

The hatred towards androids had only grown since the revolution. Even though now they were seen as a new race, equal to humans, they were not treated that way. 

The panic continued to rise in Connor’s chest as it got later into the evening. Needing to find a safe place for the night, Connor’s pace quickened, his eyes searched the wasteland-resembling infrastructure surrounding him, his LED flashed yellow. 

From behind him, Connor heard an anger-filled voice shout, “Hey, asshole!”

Immediately tensing, Connor’s fighting instinct kicked in. He turned around to be face to face with a man emerging from a nearby bar. The man grabbed Connor’s arm, wrinkling his Cyber Life uniform and digging his fingers into the deviant’s arm. The smell of alcohol coming off of the assailant was a tell-tale sign of how this was going to go. 

It didn’t take long before Connor’s nose was leaking blue blood and the sting radiated from his nose to the back of his head. As he laid on the sidewalk, dirty rain-water soaked him down to the bone, the man above him growled, “You think you’re free? You’re nothing but a piece of plastic!” 

Before the drunk’s boot could collide with Connor’s face, he lurched out of the way, only to be kicked in the thirium pump. That blow immobilized him; since becoming a deviant, feelings of all kind, including pain were new and surprisingly intense. The next kick did land on Connor’s face, so did the next, and the one after that. His hands were scraped from the pavement and his uniform was ripped. 

Managing to get away from the raging man, Connor started to run and didn’t stop until he reached a familiar house; Lieutenant Anderson’s small one-story yellow house. Checking his internal clock it read, ‘1:06 A.M’. Not wanting to disturb the lieutenant but needing help, Connor knocked once, twice, and rang the doorbell before mostly-asleep Hank, holding a gun, answered the door.

Hank’s blue eyes were full of curiosity and worry as he lowered the gun. Before he could speak, Connor started to ramble, “I’m so sorry, Lieutenant. I just… I need help.”

Sighing but pulling Connor into the house, Hank huffed, “The fuck happened to you? Do you know what time it is?” Hank lead Connor over to the kitchen table as Sumo, the gentle giant, sniffed at Connor’s feet. After Connor sat down, Hank grabbed a clean towel and wet it with warm water. Now that he had a chance to take a deep breath, Hank asked again, “What happened?”

As Hank cleaned the blue blood off his face, Connor tried to explain, “Some people still don’t like androids.”

Seeing the hurt in Connor’s brown eyes broke Hank’s heart; pain was not something familiar when looking at Connor. Hank shook his head in disgust at his fellow humans, “Jesus…” After a minute, Hank asked, “Where the fuck have you been by the way? The revolution ended a week ago.”

Immediately, Connor started to shift in his chair and fidget with his jacket sleeve, “I’ve been a bunch of places.”

Connor winced as Hank cleaned a particularly sore spot on his cheek; he also winced at Hank’s question, “Talking to androids?”

Of course, Hank would think that Connor was doing something good and productive; of course, Connor was a disappointment, “…hiding.”

That seemed to shock Hank more than anything else, “Hiding?! Connor, you helped lead a revolution. Why the hell are you hiding?”

“Now that I’m a deviant, I can feel pain.” Hank’s facial expression of, ‘So what?!' prompted Connor to elaborate by pointing at his face, “It hurts.”

Hank could feel the crushing feeling in his chest spread as he looked at the tears start to build in Connor’s eyes. Trying to help him feel better, Hank lead Connor to the bathroom after giving him his old, grey DPD sweatshirt and a clean pair of boxers. He told Connor to leave his wet and dirty clothes in the laundry bin and get changed.

By the time Connor was done, Hank had put a pillow and a blanket on his couch. He smiled when Connor came out in his clothes, looking gorgeous but Hank was going to keep that to himself, “It’s late. I’m going to head back to bed. Stay the night, okay?”

The heavy feeling in Connor’s stomach lessened at the kind gesture. Being back in Hank’s presence made Connor feel safe for the first time since the revolution. He managed to smile through his reply, “Thank you, Lieutenant.”


	2. Chapter 2

The next morning when Hank woke up from his alcohol supported sleep, he stumbled out into the living room in his usual well-worn blue t-shirt and boxers. He startled for a second when he saw Connor sitting straight up on the couch, only relaxing when he remembered what he offered the night before. 

Connor’s LED was cycling from yellow to red and back. Hank cleared his throat to snap the android out of his thoughts, “So… I was thinking, you can stay for as long as you want. I have to admit, I’ve actually kind of missed you and your quirks. So, what do you think?”

Connor’s watchful eyes observed as Hank shuffled around his kitchen to make a pot of coffee. He couldn’t help the pang of guilt that ran through his mind, “Only if I would not be an inconvenience to you or your lifestyle.”

Hank rolled his eyes because one, it is way too early in the morning for this and two, what lifestyle? Being a sad, lonely, drunk? Deciding to ignore that, Hank replied after taking a drink of coffee, “So, you’re staying. What do you want to do?”

Connor’s answer was immediate. No delay or hesitation, no need to second guess himself, “Solve cases with you.”

Thinking that was just Connor’s software answering, Hank decided to reword his question, “What do you like to do?” The silence told Hank all he needed to know so he pushed on, “Anything?”

Red that cycled into Connor’s LED as he realized that he didn’t truly enjoy anything or have any real interests beyond being a detective, “No. Nothing.” 

Hank patted Connor on the shoulder in the most platonic way possible, “Well, think about it.” Walking back to his bedroom with a fresh cup of coffee, Hank shook his head trying to figure out how somebody who was so strong during the revolution could be so quiet and reserved a week later. 

After changing, Hank walked back out into kitchen ad quickly fed Sumo before grabbing his keys and walking over to where Connor was sitting on the couch. He offered a warm smile that nowadays was saved for Connor, “Just relax, okay? I have to run to the station, I’ll be back later.”

But Connor didn’t relax; ‘kicking up his feet’ was not something he knew how to do; instead, he took it upon himself to clean Hank’s entire house. Starting in the living room, he vacuumed, cleaned up the empty beer bottles, cleaned the fingerprints and smudges from the television, vacuumed the couch cushions and fluffed the pillows. 

Moving to the kitchen, the floor was mopped, the large pile of dishes in the sink were thoroughly scrubbed and dried before being put away, Sumo’s food was tidied and his bowls washed and refilled. 

Next was the bathroom and laundry room. The finishing touches were washing the hallway floors, shelves, ceiling fans, and lamps. Connor did decide to stay out of Hank’s bedroom, deciding that his Lieutenant valued his personal space and cleaning his bedroom would have been a violation of his space; the last thing he wanted to do was offend Hank and be told to leave. He couldn’t go back to hiding again.

The next time Connor checked the time, it was early evening. Hank came back around five o’clock and stopped dead in his tracks as soon as he was through the front door, “I’m bac—holy shit… did you clean?”

Awkwardly smiling, Connor kept on petting Sumo who was laid across his lap, “Welcome back, Lieutenant.” 

Hank hung up his jacket on the hook by the front door and looked around his house in disbelief, “Jesus, you didn’t have to clean the whole house…thanks, Connor.”

Connor smiled at Hank’s gratitude, “It was no problem. I didn’t clean your bedroom, in respect for your personal boundaries. Now, what should I do?”

Knowing exactly what Connor was doing, deflecting from what he was feeling, but Hank decided to go along with it for now, “I have to shower and eat so if you want you can take Sumo for a walk?”

The smile that crossed Connor’s face made warmth blossom in Hank’s chest but he ignored that too. Connor jumped up from the couch, followed by Sumo, “Okay, Lieutenant.” He grabbed Sumo’s leash he had hung by the front door earlier. 

Just as he was about to leave, Hank grabbed his arm and chuckled, “You should probably put some pants on before you go.” 

Looking down, Connor noticed he was still in Hank’s sweatshirt and boxers. After putting on his now clean and dry black jeans, Connor and Sumo started their walk. 

By the time they returned, Hank was showered and done eating. He was sitting on the couch with his feet on the coffee table and a cold beer in his hand. It only took Sumo a few seconds after Connor unclipped his leash to bounce up to Hank and flop down onto his lap. 

Connor walked over to the couch but didn’t sit down, instead opting to look at Hank with those big brown eyes, “Now what?”

Hank huffed and rolled his eyes, “Just fuckin’ sit down.” His sourness lessened when Connor took his advice and tried his best to relax against the couch cushions. 

After two more beers, Hank fell fast asleep on the couch, his chin dipped down as he supported the side of his head in his hand. Now ignoring the T.V, Connor intently studied Hank; the few strands of Hank’s grey hair that had fallen into his face, his short newly-trimmed grey beard. More than anything, Connor paid attention to how peaceful the Lieutenant’s face looked. He looked so handsome, so strong. An unfamiliar feeling filled Connor; it was warm but almost painful and very hard to identify.

That peaceful moment was disturbed by a loud snore. It defiantly wasn’t from Connor or Sumo, who looked equally disrupted by the volume of it. Connor started to whisper, “…Lieutenant?” 

Another loud snore broke through the silence followed by Connor’s slightly louder voice, “Lieutenant?”

Then silence. And more silence. And more… and even more. Then it occurred to Connor that Hank wasn’t breathing so he did the only logical thing he could think of; grabbing Hank’s forearm and harshly shaking it, “Lieutenant!”

Hank woke up with a startled snort, “Wha—?! What’s going on?!” His panicked blue eyes found Connor’s worried face.

Releasing Hank’s arm, Connor calmed his thirium pump, “You fell asleep and stopped breathing. I believe you’re suffering from obstructive sleep apnea. It’s when the muscles in the back of your throat collapse during sleep. Being an older male you are more susceptible, weight can also be a contributing factor. It can cause high blood pressure, stroke, heart disease, and lethargy. Proper head elevation and better lifestyle choices can correct it.”

Hank started half-asleep at Connor but ended up smirking, “Doctor Detective, huh? I’ll be sure to elevate. Get some rest, Connor.”

As Hank stretched and stood up, Connor quickly blurted out, “Lieutenant… I would perhaps be more comfortable with a job to do while you rest for the night.”

In his tired state, Hank put a hand on top of Connor’s head, trying to ignore how soft the android’s hair was. (Seriously, why did they make his hair so soft?!) He smiled and tried to reassure Connor, “Just rest, no need to work 24/7.”

Before Connor could argue, Hank was gone. No job? No work? No purpose? Useless. He was useless. A useless deviant. As he sat in silence, his LED flickered from yellow to red all night. Instead of resting, Connor stewed in his own mind. 

Somehow, without him realizing, it was soon morning. His LED still a dim yellow, his eyes still searching, his chest still aching.

Hank, like the morning before, snapped Connor out of his thoughts, “Did you sleep well? Wait… do androids sleep?”

Connor answered but his heart wasn’t in the conversation, “We can go into a resting period known as stasis which is essential to keeping our systems running properly.” His reply was a reflex, not a real answer.

Trying to understand that, Hank asked, “Okay… did you stasis well?”

Connor lied through his teeth, “Yes. Did you sleep well?”

Again, Hank made another pot of coffee and replied, “Like a drunk baby.”

Before Hank left for the station, he smiled at Connor, not noticing the vacant look on his face, “I’ll send you any evidence on cases, maybe you can help if I get stuck. Until then, just try to get your head figured out. You’ve been through a lot lately.”

If only he knew…


	3. Chapter 3

Every passing day pulled Connor deeper into depression. Every day he tried his best to get a job but no matter what, nobody wanted to hire him. Nobody wanted an android, a deviant to say the least and even if they didn’t have a problem with an android; they didn’t want an ex-detective.

It had been two weeks since Hank took in Connor and neither one of them regretted that choice. Hank’s only issue with it was what he’d been trying to ignore since he met the android; his obvious attraction to Connor. 

For the past many years of his life, Hank hadn’t allowed himself to feel companionship. He hadn’t felt the need; reserving himself to believe that he would just be alone for the rest of his life.  
Now that Connor was with him, the thoughts of maybe not having to be lonely forever crept into his mind. And that, scared the absolute hell out of him.

It was late on Tuesday night when Hank came home from the station. The first unusual thing he noticed was all the lights off, the second was Sumo nervously pacing by the front door instead of napping on the couch, and lastly and most worrying, was the sound of Connor crying from the kitchen. 

Through the darkness, Connor’s LED violently glowed red. When Hank flipped on the light, he got a better look at Connor, sitting on the floor with his back leaning against the kitchen cabinets. With his knees pulled up against his chest and his tears flowing down his cheeks, Hank noticed for the first time how small Connor really looked. Especially with Hank’s large sweatshirt coving him completely. 

“Connor? What are you doing?” Hank took two steps towards Connor until he noticed his revolver in Connor’s shaking hand. Hank’s entire world seemed to screech to a halt as the bile rose up the back of his throat. Willing his feet to move, Hank slowly and cautiously moved to Connor’s side, stopping when he saw Connor tighten his grip on the gun. 

Through his sobs, Connor choked on his words, “I have no purpose… no use.”

Hank didn’t want his voice to come out so angry but yet, it happened, “So what?! You’re just going to kill yourself?!” He sat down in front of Connor, trying to slowly get close so he could grab the gun without spooking Connor.

The calm but devastating look in Connor’s eyes scared the hell out of Hank as Connor whispered, “It feels right.” 

Thankfully, Hank was close enough to grab the silver revolver away from Connor and finally start actually talking to him, “No fucking way.”

But Connor wanted that. He wanted to die. With his sobs starting again, Connor reached out; either for Hank or the gun, he couldn’t tell. 

Hank couldn’t think of anything else to do other than wrap his arms around Connor and pull him close, soothingly rubbed his back as Connor sobbed into his neck, “I just want to be good enough.”

Out of the corner of his eye, Hank could see Connor’s LED start to rapidly flash red. A terrible thought came into his mind; a memory of Connor standing behind him in the interrogation room at the station and saying, “Deviants have a tendency to self-destruct in stressful situations.”

That memory was solidified when Connor tried to grab the gun back from Hank and started yelling, “Make it stop! Make it stop! Make it stop!”

Hank wasn’t about to get into a wrestling match with an android, knowing he’d lose, so instead, he slid the gun far away from them to where Connor couldn’t reach it.

Noticing what happened, Connor started to pull away from Hank. His wailing and sobbing broke Hank’s heart as he desperately tried to silence Connor. Using all the muscle he had, Hank pinned Connor down by his arms, “Please, just stop. Just breathe. I’m right here, I got you.” He’s been here many times so he did what he wished somebody would have done for him, something he would never admit to. He just wanted somebody to hold him.

Hank scooped Connor up in his arms, sitting them both back up and not letting him go an inch. Connor bunched Hank’s t-shirt in his hands, desperately holding onto the person he needs.

After a long time, Connor’s tears finally slowed. Hank pulled away from him and cradled one of his flushed cheeks in his hand, “You okay?” His blue eyes were full of worry as he studied Connor’s face.

Connor sniffled and shook his head before answering in a meek voice, “No.”

Subconsciously, Hank soothingly stroked Connor’s cheekbone with his thumb, “Tell you what? I’ll take some time off of work and we will work through this.”

With his LED still red, Connor numbly followed Hank to the couch. Allowing Hank to basically tuck him in under the warm blanket, Connor finally took a deep breath, even though it was still a bit shakey. 

Sumo loyally laid on top of Connor’s lap an let the android to shakily stroke him, trying to calm his systems. While Connor laid with his furry friend, Hank busied himself with locking away the two guns and many knives he had in his house. After eating and showering, Hank went back into the living room to find Connor in stasis.

Allowing himself the pleasure, Hank stroked back Connor’s soft brown hair, “Goodnight, Con.” 

The next morning, Connor woke out of stasis to the smell of frying bacon. He sat up and quickly ran a full-systems check, finding everything in order, Connor stood up and walked into the kitchen. 

Hearing the quiet shuffling of Connor’s feet behind him, Hank turned around and offered a kind smile, “Hey, morning. How are you feeling?”

Connor sat down in one of the kitchen chairs and thought hard before answering, “…Strange.”

Hank seemed to understand what he meant, “I bet.” But there was one question that needed to be asked, “You going to tell me how long you’ve been feeling like this? Take it from somebody who’s been there, this doesn’t happen overnight.”

Connor searched his memory, “One week, three days, four hours, and twenty-three minutes since I first thought of killing myself.”

Hank sat down across from Connor with his breakfast and sighed in frustration, “Why didn’t you say anything? Damnit, Connor. You talk to me about this shit, okay? It’s important.” His mind screamed, ‘You’re important to me.’ But the words didn’t come out.

“Okay, Hank.” When Connor said that, Hank’s head snapped up to look at Connor who was slightly blushing a baby blue and fidgeting with that freaking coin. That was the first time Connor had ever called him Hank; it was always ‘Lieutenant’ or ‘Lieutenant Anderson.’ He had to admit, he loved his name on Connor’s lips. 

Hank ate his breakfast and sucked down three cups of coffee before telling Connor what he had planned for the day, “I believe there is something we should do today… get you some clothes. After all, you can’t live in my old sweatshirt.”

Connor’s pout was pretty goddamn adorable with his pouty lips and doughy eyes, “But I like your sweatshirt.” Almost possessively, Connor wrapped the oversized hoodie closer to his body.  
Hank couldn’t help but laugh, “You can keep it. You just need some more clothes.”

A few hours later, Hank and Connor found themselves in a small clothing shop. Connor, having no prior experience in shopping, definitely needed Hank’s help. As they walked through the aisles of clothes, Hank handed many different things to Connor. 

In the dressing room, Connor tried on a few t-shirts, sweaters, and jeans. Everything was going well, his LED a calm blue until he tried on a smaller short-sleeved turquoise button up. When he walked out to show Hank, his LED was yellow and his hands restlessly tugged at the bottom of the shirt. 

Hank instantly picked up that something was wrong so when he asked, Connor grumped, “It’s too tight! I look dumb.”

That blew Hank’s mind because he’s never seen somebody look as gorgeous as Connor did standing in front of him. He couldn’t let Connor think that he looked anything less than stunning, “No! No… you look good, Connor.”

Thankfully, Connor stopped fidgeting as his LED turned back to blue to match the subtle blue blush on his cheeks, “…Really? You really like it?”

Hank chuckled at just how goddamn cute Connor is, “Yeah, you girl. I really like it.”

Trying to hide the blush that intensified on his face, Connor turned back into the dressing room to get changed back into his sweats. From where he was sitting on the comfortable couch, Hank tried to control his breathing. It wasn’t fair how beautiful the android was.

When they started to pay at the register, Connor tried but Hank quickly stopped him, “I got it, think of it as a gift.” Again, Connor blushed and shyly thanked Hank, trying to ignore the older man’s increased heartbeat and temperature.


	4. Chapter 4

At home, Hank gave Connor an empty drawer in the bedroom in his dresser for his new clothes. After getting settled, the two of them decided on watching a movie together. As they got comfortable on the couch and about half-way through the movie, Connor interrupted Hank’s thoughts, “What’s she doing?”

As Hank started to pay more attention to the screen he noticed exactly what was going on. One of the female characters was on her knees giving the lead male character a blowjob. Hank stuttered trying to think of how he was going to explain this, “It’s um… it’s a kind of sex.”

Connor squinted his eyes and tilted his head like a confused puppy, “Is her mouth… on his penis? Isn’t that unsanitary? …And painful?!”

Hank couldn’t help but chuckle at Connor’s innocence, “Yes, no, and no.”

After a moment of silence, Connor piped up again, “I’ve done some research, I believe I understand the mechanics.”

“I didn’t think you’d want to know. I just mean... I didn’t think you were interested in men.” Hank’s heartbeat kicked up. His mind screamed at him that this was a dangerous conversation. Turn back now.

But Connor had already answered, “Since I have become a deviant, I do find men more aesthetically pleasing so it would be helpful to have this information in my system.”

Hank had drunk a fair amount of whiskey so his drunk mind supplied him with the words, “Oh yeah? Got a type?”

“You.”

One word definitely gave Hank a heart attack. You? YOU?! How the hell could Connor be attracted to him? Coughing a few times to try and get his breath back, Hank scoffed, “You can’t just say shit like that. Anyway, I’m only and gross. You don’t want me.”

Connor shifted so he was facing Hank’s wide blue eyes, “I do want you.”

They spent minutes in silence staring at each other just trying to understand what was being said. Hank was the first one to break the silence, “I’m either way too drunk or not drunk enough.”

Through the dim room, Hank could see Connor’s LED cycling from yellow to red and back again. He kept his eyes on that bright circle as Connor slowly moved onto his knees in-between Hank’s legs. 

Hank looked at where Connor was on the floor and couldn’t help the stutter in his voice, “C—Connor…” He could do nothing but watch in shock as Connor’s slim fingers tugged off his sweatpants. He tried to will his erection to go away but Connor looked like a wet dream willingly kneeling in front of him. Hank wanted to push Connor away, tell him he didn’t have to do this but if he wanted to, who was Hank to deny him?

Then Connor took Hank’s head into his mouth and every thought in the old cops mind disappeared. The only thing he could think about was the tight, wet, heat of Connor’s mouth as he sucked Hank’s considerable length deep into his throat. He barely even recognized his own broken voice, “Holy… fucking… shit.”

Before he let himself get completely lost, Hank pushed Connor away by his shoulder and harshly breathed out, “Alright, whoa! Stop it!”

Connor’s previously blue LED quickly turned red as he sported a kicked puppy look, “I didn’t mean to upset you.”

Those eyes… god, those eyes. Hank couldn’t handle the hurt in them as he quickly tried to control himself, “Upset—Connor, the fuck? You didn’t upset me, you really just caught me off guard. Nobody has touched me in a very long time.”

Connor nodded as though he understood but still seemed upset so Hank shook his head and quietly said, “Come up here.”

As Connor slowly and cautiously moved, Hank grew impatient so he slid his hands under Connor’s arms, holding him around his ribs to pick him up and place him so he was straddling the older man’s lap. 

Hank was pleasantly surprised at how light Connor was. He did always have a thing for twinks. Ignoring that he was still naked from the waist down, Hank put his hands on Connor’s slender hips and looked into his curious eyes, “Do you have any idea what you just did? You just ruined me for everyone else for the rest of my life.”

Connor’s cheeks flushed a dark blue as Hank ran his large, strong hands up Connor’s arms; his skin was smooth and pliant, just like a human's would be. Sometimes it surprised Hank how human Connor felt but again, wasn’t that the idea?

Slowly, Hank leaned forward and gently brushed their lips together. From the first kiss, they were both lost.  
Hesitantly, Hank pulled away and cradled Connor’s smooth cheek in his rough hand, “Connor… I… are you sure this is okay? It’s just …with how you’ve been feeling, I don’t want to take advantage of you.”

Connor nuzzled his cheek against Hank and tried to keep his hands still but couldn’t help but trail his fingertips down Hank’s chest, “I want this. I want you.”

A thought crossed Hank’s mind that worried the hell out of him, “You’ve never been with anybody, have you? Shit… have you even kissed anyone before?”

Connor proudly smiled, “Yes… you.”

Hank smiled back but it was more from adoration, “Okay. We’ll take it slow, okay? There’s no rush.”

Connor tilted his head as he was still half confused but then Hank started to kiss him again and every thought flew out of his mind. 

Their kiss started slow and curious; just starting to get to know each other. But the slow drag of their lips quickly became needy and quick. 

Hank nipped at Connor’s bottom lip before softly smoothing over it with his tongue. Connor whined and wrapped a hand around Hank’s still-hard cock. Connor broke the kiss and rested his forehead against Hanks, “H—Hank, I need… something. I don’t know I just—”

Hank smoothed his hand down Connor’s back and hushed him, “Shh, trust me, I know exactly what you need.”  
Still holding Connor, Hank shifted so he was laying down on the couch with his head on the armrest; he held Connor against him by grabbing a handful of his tight ass and pulling him close. 

Connor moaned against Hank’s mouth and Hank could feel his hard cock through his sweatpants. Hank couldn’t help but chuckle, “Nice and hard for me?”

Connor whimpered and ground his hips down against Hank’s cock. Hank choked down his own groan. Loving Connor’s enthusiasm, he couldn’t help but praise him, “Good boy.”

Connor does it again before Hank interrupts him, “Con, will you take off your shirt? Let me get a good look at you.”

Eagerly sitting up, Connor grabbed the bottom seam of his t-shirt and pulled it off over his head. Hank almost passed out at how stunning Connor’s smooth, pale skin was. His blue blush dusted from his neck down his chest. Seeing Connor looking so amazing, sitting on his lap made all the air leave Hank’s lungs, “Goddamn it, you’re so gorgeous.”

Ever the sweet one, Connor softly kissed Hank’s cheek and whispered, “So are you.”

Before Connor could grind their hips together again, Hank stopped him, “Wait, take your pants off.”

He pulled off his sweatpants inelegantly and rushed but he got them off and that’s all that matters. Once their hard lengths were hotly pushed against each other, Connor carefully moved his hips forward and loudly moaned at how sensitive he was. 

After licking his palm, Hank wrapped his hand around both of them and slowly started to stroke both of them.  
Connor helplessly rutted against Hank as he buried his face in the older man’s neck. The scratch of Hank’s beard and his familiar smell made Connor feel comfort and desire all at once. 

With Hank’s name on his lips, Connor spilled over himself and Hank. The sight of Connor’s face as he found his release and the pleasure he had never felt before was enough to push Hank over the edge. 

Being unable to hold himself up any longer, Connor flopped down on Hank and felt the tingle of his afterglow flow through his body. 

With his clean hand, Hank stroked Connor’s hair back and took a deep breath, “Well… holy shit. Not how I thought this night was going to go but it was definitely an improvement. You doing okay?”

Connor tried to snuggle closer to Hank but he was already completely flush with the older man, “I’m happy.”

After indulging Connor with a few more minutes of cuddling, Hank used his t-shirt to clean them both up. He smiled and quickly pecked Connor’s lips, “Come on, you.”

Connor tilted his head and squinted, “Where are we going?”

Hank chuckled as though it was obvious, “My room. We hook up, we sleep in the same bed. Thems the breaks.”

As they laid in bed together, Connor stiffly laid still and unmoving on his back. Hank, ignoring the unfamiliarity of sharing a bed with somebody again, rolled Connor over and wrapped an arm around his waist, pulling his back against his own chest. Slowly but surely they both relaxed and drifted into their own states of peaceful unconsciousness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thoughts so far? Feedback appreciated. Much love xx


	5. Chapter 5

The cool breeze brought the crisp October air in through the open window of Hank’s car. The rain from the night before had quickly frozen as this year was colder than usual. Hank looked into the rearview mirror to see his son, Cole’s, happy smiling face as he played with his favorite toy firetruck. What happened next felt like an eternity and a split second at the same time. 

With the sound of his car rolling over and crushing in on itself, Hank woke up with a shout, calling out for his son, trying desperately to save him. 

As he woke up, Hank realized that he was drenched in sweat. The nausea hit him almost immediately. He only wanted to wake Connor up but he seemed peaceful and deep in stasis so instead, Hank crawled out of bed on his shaking legs. He managed to get to the bathroom before he emptied his stomach into the toilet. 

Needing to fill the empty pit the nightmares always brought, Hank stumbled to the kitchen and poured himself a full glass of whiskey. It only took him seconds to completely drain it. He picked up Cole’s picture that he always kept close by and allowed himself a few tears to escape. Softly touching the photo, Hank remembered the way Cole would always fall asleep in the car; whether the drive was five minutes or three hours. He sadly smiled at the way Cole would run and jump into his arms when he got home from work. Trying to dry his tears, Hank sniffed, “I miss you, buddy… so much more than you could ever know.”

Two more glasses later, Hank could barely walk without looking at the ground to navigate. When he finally got back to the bedroom, he sunk back into bed with Connor; still lying in stasis and wearing only his boxers. 

Hank tried to think of the happiness he felt that night when he finally kissed Connor, but all he could think about was the last time he looked into Cole’s eyes. Rest did not come back easily that night. Staying on his side of the bed, Hank didn’t touch Connor for the rest of the night.

The next morning, Hank woke up with a thumping headache and a small hand holding onto his. Slowly blinking, he managed to focus his sight on Connor’s sad brown eyes. Hank mumbling out an exhausted, “What?”

Sounding defeated, Connor whispered, “I’m feeling like I want to harm myself.”

The only thing Hank could think was that he felt the same but no words came out. In fact, he barely moved enough to half-heartedly wrap his arms around Connor and hold him. Connor’s yellow LED quickly turned to a flashing red. Was Hank getting sick of him already? Did he not want to help? Was Connor not good enough? Of course, he wasn’t.

Once Hank felt a little more human, he kissed Connor’s head that was resting on his chest, “I have to go to work. Are you going to be okay here alone?”

Connor didn’t want to say no. He didn’t want to admit to Hank that he wasn’t going to be okay. He didn’t want to disappoint Hank. “I’m not alone, I have Sumo. But yes, I’ll be okay.” Somehow lying felt even worse than Hank’s reaction would have.

Once Hank left for work, Connor tried to occupy himself. He walked Sumo and spent time meticulously grooming the fluffy dog, he cleaned the house and did his and Hank’s laundry. No matter how much he tried to distract himself all he could think of was wanting to find wherever Hank hid the gun, put it in his mouth, and pull the trigger.

When Hank came home that night, he and Connor were sitting on the couch watching the Detroit Gear’s game. Hank’s arm was wrapped around Connor, who had his head nestled into Hank’s neck. They both enjoyed the closeness until Hank remembered what Connor said to him that morning. Quickly muting the TV, Hank nudged Connor closer to him, “How are you feeling by the way?” 

Connor shrugged and played with Hank’s hand, “I don’t know how to explain it. I have a strange sensation in my arms. It’s an ache that starts in my fingers and goes to my chest. It’s extremely unpleasant.”

Hank knew exactly what Connor was talking about. He felt the same way. All he could offer was a slow, sweet kiss before reassuring him that everything was going to be okay.  
Things between them stayed steady for two weeks. Some days were better for Connor. Somedays Hank didn’t have nightmares. Somedays they spent hours in bed sharing slow kisses and heated touches.

Things were okay until the Tuesday that Hank didn’t come home on time. He was usually home at the latest, seven o’clock but that night, he didn’t get home until midnight. Connor tried calling him many times, he even called the department and went to Hank’s favorite bars. After calling local hospitals, the worst situations going through his mind, Connor decided that Hank just didn’t want to be found. 

When Hank finally stumbled through the front door, Connor could immediately smell the harsh liquor coming off of him. 

Connor was by his side in a second, trying to support Hank’s slouched body and look him over for any injuries, “Are you alright? I was so worried about you.” He tried to take off Hank’s jacket that was damp from the drizzling rain. 

Raising an elbow Hank tried to get away from the grabbing hands, slurring, “Get off of me.” When Connor persisted, ignoring Hank’s grumpiness, Hank became more aggressive, “I said get the fuck off of me!”

Connor’s LED flashed a quick, hurt red, “Why are you being like this? Just let me help you.”

In his drunken stupor, Hank slammed his fist against Connor’s nose, harshly shouting, “I don’t need you! Get the fuck out!”

Before Connor could leave, the blue blood pouring from his nose dripped onto the floor. Quickly backing away from Hank, Connor slammed the front door behind him. He didn’t even try to hold back his tears from the emotional and physical pain as his feet made quick work of leaving the small house he had called home in the distance.

Through his sobs, Connor tried to find a place for the night. Getting closer to the downtown area saw the increase in abandoned buildings. In front of one of them was a male who looked a few years older than Connor but definitely younger than Hank. He had a sly smile and dangerous eyes. His voice sounded like it was made to lure, “Hey, you a deviant?”

Connor turned towards the man and is obviously uneasy in his answer, “Yes. Why?”

Taking two large steps towards Connor, he smiled. But it wasn’t warm or friendly, it was the look the devil would give before torturing you, “You ever try Red Ice?”

Connor immediately took a step away from him, “No.”

Holding out a small plastic bag with a few ruby rocks in it, he leaned in close, “Do you want to?”

No. Red Ice wasn’t good. One of its components was thirium. This is not a good idea. No matter how loud his mind screamed that all Connor could think about was forgetting. “Yes.”

Following the stranger into the musty building, Connor nervously sat down on the decrepit couch that was inside. The stranger placed a few rocks into a small glass pipe. He lit up the end and took a deep breath before handing the pipe and lighter to Connor and chided him on, “Go ahead.”

From the first hit, everything around Connor shifted. The walls started to morph and the floor seemed to fall out from under his feet. The stranger sitting across from him became unrecognizable as a person. His limbs felt numb and hypersensitive at the same time and his throat burning like a fire was burning inside of him. It was perfectly horrible.

Connor ran his hands through his hair as he tried to get a hold of himself. This wasn’t what he imagined. This didn’t feel right. 

The stranger smiled at him sickeningly, “Good, baby boy?” Connor was too lost to notice him sliding closer, “You want to tell me why you’re out here so late?”

His own voice was unrecognizable, “Had a fight with my boyfriend?” The last word was said as a question; he just had no other way to describe Hank.

A foreign hand stroked his hair; it didn’t feel like Hank’s, it was too rough, too wrong. Connor still couldn’t stop himself from leaning into the contact. The stranger held the pipe in Connor’s mouth and lit the end, telling him to inhale. Not telling him how much he had just put in the pipe.

Thinking about Hank made Connor sad. Was Hank sad too? Did he even care? The tears that started to pool in his eyes felt like battery acid. 

The stranger’s hand moved to Connor’s cheeks, wiping away the tears that streamed down his face, “Oh, poor pretty android. You want a new boyfriend?”

Connor’s thirium pump began to beat so hard it felt like it was rattling. He felt the stranger’s lips against his, too hard, strong and demanding. 

Connor tried to lift a hand to push the man off but his limbs felt like they were stuck in concrete as the room began to drain like a whirlpool. He tried to speak but it came out garbled, “No…no.”

Then he felt a hand fumble with the button of jeans. His panic started to pick up as everything blended together, “No! Stop.”

The stranger mouthed at his neck and whispered, “Just relax, baby.”

Connor’s instincts kicked in as he desperately reached for a weapon. When he felt the hard, cold metal of a gun tucked into the stranger’s waistband. Just trying to survive, Connor grabbed it and pressed the barrel of the gun into the guy’s stomach, shooting him once. 

The stranger yelled as his blood quickly drained onto Connor. The blood. The warm, sticky blood. It felt different. Horrible. Horrible. Off. Bad. Get it off. 

Shoving the now dead stranger off of him, Connor stood up and immediately fell to the ground. In his panic, Connor scampered across the floor. At the front door, he stood again and ran from the blood that seemed to follow him in tidal waves. 

The thick, metallic waves chased his feet, whispering their death song, trying to grab. Trying to pull. To continue killing. Connor ran and ran and ran. He ran until he forgot who he was. 

He ran until the waves grabbed him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know if androids can even do drugs but fuck it. Hope you like it so far, xx.


	6. Chapter 6

The next morning, Hank woke to Sumo’s incessant barking. Rolling over, he reached for Connor, craving the comfort the android brought him. As he started to wake up more, Hank realized that not only was Connor’s side of the bed empty, it was neatly made. Connor never got out of bed before Hank, he loved waking up next to him.

The next unusual thing was Hank’s clothing. He was wearing what he was wearing the night before. Judging from his headache and stomach pain, he was drunk last night but Connor usually made him eat something, drink water, and at least change his clothes. It was painfully obvious that none of that happened last night so again… where was Connor?

Fighting back his nausea, Hank heaved himself out of bed and shuffled out into the hall, calling out, “Con?” Hank searched the whole house and still couldn’t find him. There was no note or sign of him. The panic began to rise in his chest as he yelled, “Connor?!”

There was a feeling deep in the pit of his stomach. He just knew that something was wrong. That feeling was solidified when he saw the drops of blue blood by the front door, “What the fuck?” Hank was going to bend down to investigate when his phone rang from the bedroom. Hoping it was Connor, Hank ran to answer it. Luckily he got to it before the call ended. It was Chris calling, a fellow cop at the station. 

Half-heartedly Hank answered, “Hello?”

Chris’s voice wasn’t cheerful as usual, it was rushed and worried, “Hank, it’s Connor. You need to come to the station.”

Hank never drove to the station so fast in his entire life. By the time he got there, it was only eight in the morning; many people weren’t there yet. 

At the front door, Chris was waiting for him with a sick expression on his face. Before Hank could ask what happened, Chris started to lead him towards the interrogation room, “From what we can tell he’s physically okay.”

That is not how Hank would describe him. Looking into the small room through the glass, Hank could see Connor pacing around in just a t-shirt and jeans that were both covered in now dry blood; blood that was obviously not his. He was tugging at his hair and pacing back and forth. When he stopped, he punched the concrete wall over and over again, grunting and yelling about the waves. His tears were endless and full of pain.

Hank felt like he was going to be sick, “Oh my god.”

Captain Fowler stood next to him and calmly explained, “He’s high on red ice. Patrol found him running near the edge of the city. He wouldn’t stop until he was tazed… five times.”

There were so many questions running through Hank’s mind, the one he chose to ask was important, “Who’s blood is that?”

Fowler sadly shook his head, “We don’t know.”

Without another word to anyone else, Hank calmly walked into the interrogation room. Speaking softly, Hank tried not to spook Connor any more than he already was, “Con?”

Connor’s panicked eyes looked right through him as if he didn’t recognize who was standing in front of him, “rA9. It’s real. Real. Real. Really. Really. Not fake. I don’t—”

Ignoring his rambling, Hank cleared his throat and spoke a little louder, “Connor?”

After punching the wall again, Connor snapped, “What?!”

Hank couldn’t help but flinch but still, he pushed on, “Will you sit with me?”

Connor’s restless pacing didn’t stop, “Can’t.” His hair was a mess from running his hand through it and pulling. He had dried blue blood under his nose and blood covering him; he barely resembled the person he was less than twenty-four hours ago.

Only wanting to care for Connor, Hank tried again, “Just sit down, okay?”

Covering his ears, Connor let out a blood-curdling scream; acting as though Hank was in his head and he was trying to block him out.

Standing up, Hank grabbed Connor’s arms, trying to calm him down. Connor started to shove Hank away and scream louder. 

Realizing that the situation was unsafe for both of them, Hank quickly left the room. Opting to sit in a chair in front of the one-way glass. He ran a stressed hand over his face and tried to collect his thoughts. 

Adding to his stress, a patrolman stuck his head into the room, “Captain, we just got a report of an ice dealer that was shot last night.” Nobody needed to say anything else as they put two and two together. 

Both Fowler and Chris had to get back to work but Hank stayed for two more hours until Connor finally started to calm down. 

When he finally stopped pacing, Connor slid down to the floor with his back against the wall. While androids didn’t tire or feel pain, Deviants do feel pain so when his high started to die down, the ache that ran through his body grew stronger and stronger. 

Hank cautiously walked back into the room, crouching in front of Connor. He spoke as soft and sweet as he could, “Con?” Finally, Connor looked up at him with glassy eyes. Breathing out a sigh of relief, Hank asked, “What happened?”

“Man. Gave me ice. Tried to touch me.” Even though Connor was calmer, it was clear from his voice and broken speech that his systems were still fried. Choking down a sob, he started to babble again, “I was scared. Scared. Scared. Scared.”

Needing to hear what happened before any other officer tried to get it out of Connor, Hank interrupted his skipping, “Okay… okay, Con. Then what happened?”

Connor looked down at his still blood-stained hands, “I grabbed his gun… shot him.” Suddenly, he reached out and latched onto Hank’s arm, “Don’t deactivate me.”

The look of fear in Connor’s brown eyes was crushing. Hank softly stroked his hand, “Nobody is going to deactivate you. You and I are going to go home, okay? You’re safe now.”

A harsh double tap on the glass made them both jerk their heads towards the sound. After excusing himself, Hank walked back out and was met with Fowler, “We aren’t going to arrest him. Honestly, he got a drug dealer off the street. Nobody is complaining.”

With one problem down, it finally seemed like things were going to be okay, “Can I take him home now?”

With Fowler’s permission and Hank’s jacket around his shoulders, Connor tried to carry himself to Hank’s car. Admittedly, he needed some help but Hank didn’t leave his side the whole time.

Back at Hank’s, Connor was still covered in dry blood and dirt. Hank made quick work of stripping Connor out of those horrible clothes (which he planned on burning). He carefully helped Connor into a warm bath with Sumo guarding the door. 

As Hank washed Connor’s hair for him, the deviant counted the yellow tiles of Hank’s shower over and over again. 

Not before long, Connor was wearing comfy pajamas that Hank insisted on him buying and he was safely tucked into Hank’s bed. With Sumo laying on one side and Hank on the other, Connor stayed in stasis all day; his systems desperately trying to correct themselves and get back to some level of normality. 

When he finally woke up, it was approaching the evening. Both Hank and Sumo were loyally by his side and he felt more like himself. Immediately searching for Hank, Connor rolled over and grabbed at the t-shirt covering Hank’s soft stomach. His voice still sounded small but at last, familiar, “Hank?”

Jerking his head to the side, Hank rolled over to face Connor and give him all his attention, “Con? Hey, you back with me?”

As if he was trying to soothe himself, Connor carefully pet Hank’s grey beard and whispered, “I missed you.”

Letting Connor stroke his face, Hank’s blue eyes searched for the answer to his question, “What happened? Why did you leave?”

The hurt flashed across Connor’s face again, “You came home drunk, said you didn’t need me. You punched me and told me to leave.”

There it was, Hank’s fault. Connor was in so much pain because of him. Hank only knew one thing, he needed to protect and make Connor happy, “I’m so sorry, Con. I promise that will never happen again.”

Those puppy eyes bore holes into Hank’s soul, “Why would you do that?”

Pulling Connor into his arms, Hank soothingly rubbed his back in slow circles, “It’s no excuse but it was Cole’s birthday and I just needed to get drunk. I didn’t mean to take it out on you.”

Connor nuzzled against Hank’s chest, feeling sorry for him but not wanting him to be upset, “It’s okay, Hank.” The feeling of strong, familiar arms around him was exactly what Connor needed. Still, he couldn’t shake the deep ache he felt, “Something’s wrong.”

Hank gently scratched the short hairs at the nape of Connor’s neck, something the android told him every time he did it how much he liked it, “What is it?”

Connor sounded so defeated when he answered, “…I’m tired.”

Hank understood why that felt so wrong. Connor, even though he was a deviant, was still an android. Being tired wasn’t a normal feeling for him. Hank kissed the top of Connor’s head, “That’s okay. You just rest. I’ll be right here if you need me.” 

As Connor returned to stasis Hank thought that maybe everything would be okay.

Maybe.


	7. Chapter 7

Lying in bed that night was a relief to Hank; the warmth and familiar comfort of his bed was only made better with Connor curled up next to him. The android was still in stasis from earlier, still trying to pull himself back together. 

Hank’s slumber was interrupted by a hand shaking his arm. Mostly-asleep and fighting consciousness, he mumbled, “What? What is it?”

The lovely sweetness of Connor’s voice wasn’t there; it was raspy and distressed as he rushed out a whisper, “I want it.”

Still not completely processing what was going on, Hank had to ask, “Want what?”

“Ice.” Connor’s grip on Hank’s forearm tightened as his voice shook on the single syllable that held so much weight. 

Now, completely awake, Hank’s blue eyes opened to show how full of disbelief they were, “Are you fucking kidding me? After everything that happened today?! You want more?!” With Connor’s ashamed but sure nod, Hank’s anger grew, “No, Connor! Absolutely not. Go the fuck back to sleep or rest or whatever the fuck you do.”

Hank rolled over and huffed out a sigh, leaving Connor with an itch under his skin. The plastic of his chassis vibrating with the need to fill himself with the red poison. The need was worse now that Hank was angry. He always made Hank angry when all he wanted was to make him happy.

Wanting to let Hank go back to sleep, Connor didn’t push his feelings onto the Lieutenant. Instead, he opted to slide out of bed and silently walk into the kitchen. Trying to calm himself and gain some control back, Connor started to pace. One, two, three. One, two, three. Left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot. 

Nothing helped, the need still ate at him until he decided he couldn’t take it anymore. His reasoning program seemed to fail him as he quietly changed into jeans and a hoodie. Feeling like somebody else— somebody irrational was controlling him, Connor started to walk down the street towards the ominous darkness that the city brought at night.

Mid-dream of his son talking to him about his day at school, Cole’s voice was replaced by loud barking. Pulling himself out of his sleep, Hank realized that it was Sumo’s panicked barking that had woken him up. 

Out of instinct, Hank reached over to Connor’s side of the bed to find that it was once again empty. Remembering the hell that happened yesterday, Hank immediately started to panic, “Connor?!” 

Moving faster than he ever had in the middle of the night, Hank pulled on the sweatpants he had discarded before going to bed. He searched through the house but when he found nothing, he decided that Connor had left. Their previous conversation constantly running through his mind, Hank jumped into his car and started off towards the city, angrily grumbling, “When I find you, you fucking android, you are in so much trouble.” 

He desperately scanned the streets for Connor before finding him walking with determination towards empty buildings and dark alleys. Quickly jerking the car over to the side of the road, Hank threw it in park and opened his door. He approached Connor, ready for a fight, “Get in the car right now!”

Backing away from Hank, Connor looked terrified and broken, “No. You don’t get it! I need it!” Connor knew that he didn’t. He knew that Red Ice messed with him the way it didn’t hurt humans. It made him go insane; the flashbacks he’s been experiencing on his walk to poison himself reassured him of that fact.

Hank gave up on anger, realizing that he wasn’t mad. He was worried. His hands grabbed Connor’s shoulders pulled him closer, “No, you don’t get it! I need you! You don’t get to just start using drugs and kill yourself! You made me love you, Connor. You do not get to leave me! Now, get in the fucking car!”

Hank loved him? Half-aware of the fact that Hank just bared his feelings openly (something that was a rare occurrence) Connor got into the passenger seat without another word. On the drive home, tears started to fall from Connor’s eyes. Hank knew being angry was irrational, it’s not like Connor wants to want drugs. Reaching over, Hank supportively took Connor’s hand.  
Happily squeezing Hank’s hand back, Connor sniffled and whispered, “…I love you too.”

When they got back to the house, Hank stopped Connor before he could walk away and gently wiped his artificial tears from his cheeks, “I mean it, Connor. Don’t destroy yourself.” Hank has seen so much devastation from the Red Ice epidemic, he couldn’t bear the thought of Connor becoming anyone other than who he is. 

That night, when they got back into bed, Hank held Connor tight hoping that he could hold him there. 

When Hank woke up the next morning, he was overjoyed to see that Connor was still in bed with him. That joy quickly faded when he realized he was going to have to leave for work soon. Absolutely terrified to leave Connor alone, Hank tried to calm himself. Gently kissing Connor’s head and waking him up. When Connor’s soft eyes opened, his LED blinked a light blue Hank smiled back at him, “Morning, I have to go to work but I’ll be back in a little bit. Don’t do anything to get yourself hurt.”

With Connor assuring him that he will be safe, Hank started to get ready for work. Before leaving, Hank knelt in front of Sumo and scratched behind his floppy ears, “You take good care of Con, okay?” 

The Saint Bernard boofed at Hank before trotting off down the hall. After hearing him flop down onto the bed, Hank left for work feeling that Connor was going to be safe. However, an hour later and Hank’s brain and over-active imagination had him thinking otherwise. He decided to call Connor. After realizing that he was okay, Hank relaxed but still proceeded to call him every hour and every hour, Connor was okay. 

The Lieutenant came home almost a half-hour later than usual. After placing the few shopping bags he was holding onto the kitchen table, he called into the house, “Con? Come here for a second!”

After hearing the washing machine kick on, Hank saw Connor walking towards him in his outfit of choice, Hank’s sweatshirt and a pair of boxers. The smile on his face was only exaggerated when Hank smirked, “I have a surprise for you.” Reaching into his jacket pocket, Hank excitedly pulled out the tiniest Golden Retriever puppy. 

The look on Connor’s face was exactly what Hank was going for. Hank cradled her in his large hand, “I found her on the street today. No mom or siblings. She’s only two days old and going to need a lot of care. Now, don’t start thinking that you can bring home all kinds of strays. I just thought maybe you’d like a bit of extra company until we get you back to the station with me.”

At this point, Connor was still frozen in place with a shell-shocked look plastered on his face. With his feet slowly bringing him closer to Hank and his new friend. Very carefully, he took the puppy from Hank, holding her like she was the most precious being in the entire expanse of the universe. He marveled at her still closed eyes and gentle features, “She’s so small.” 

That’s when the puppy yelped and all bets were off as Connor started sobbing. Hank, hoping they were tears of happiness still asked, “You alright?”

Frantically nodding, Connor cradled the puppy close to his chest, already protecting her, “She’s so cute. I love her so much.”

Fondly rolling his eyes, Hank started to unpack the bags from a local pet store, “Come on, let’s get her settled.”

In their bedroom, Hank and Connor set up a large crate that Hank had in the attic from when Sumo was a puppy. Inside the crate, they put a heating blanket (on the lowest setting) under a soft blanket and a puppy pad on top of that. Hank also bought blunt ended syringes and formula for a puppy of her age, “She’s going to have to be fed every two to three hours.” 

After quickly setting his internal timer for every two and a half-hours, Connor smiled down at the sweet puppy, “I’ll never let her be hungry.”

Hank stood up and walked into the hallway where Sumo was waiting for them outside of the closed bedroom door. After clipping on Sumo’s leash and getting a strong hold of him, Hank slowly brought him over to where Connor was sitting on the floor with their new puppy being carefully guarded in his arms. 

Much to their relief, Sumo spends a few moments carefully sniffing the puppy before tentatively licking her fur. After licking her a few times, Sumo flopped down near his family and promptly fell asleep. After unclipping Sumo’s leash, Hank grabbed a syringe and filled it with the milky formula, “She probably needs to be fed. Do you want to try?”

After Hank showed him how to slowly feed the puppy without choking or drowning her, he instructed Connor on how to stimulate the puppy to use the bathroom. As they sat in a content silence, Hank asked, “So, are you going to give her a name?”

“I haven’t thought about it… I’ve never named anyone before.” Deep in thought, Connor stared down at the puppy, a million names running through his system but none sounding right. 

That night when Hank reached over and couldn’t feel Connor, he was immediately panicking. Quickly sitting up, he reached for the light on his side table, “Fuck!”

He was about to get out of bed when he heard Connor’s hushed voice come through the darkness, “Shh, Hank. She’s sleeping.”

Calming down, Hank still turned on the light before rubbing his eyes, “God, you scared me. What are you doing?”

Looking over to the corner of the room, he was Connor holding the puppy and carefully rocking her, “Daisy was hungry.”

Hank couldn’t help but smile, “Daisy, huh? Well, now that you took good care of her, will you come back to bed?”

After placing Daisy back into the warm crate, Connor crawled back under the covers. Curling up with Hank, he softly kissed the older man, “Thank you, Hank… for everything.” For the first time since the revolution, Connor knew this is exactly where he was meant to be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if this chapter seems rushed and a bit sloppy. Certain health problems are affecting me both physically and mentally. My motivation hasn't been great but I didn't want to keep ya'll waiting. Thanks for reading so far xx.


	8. Chapter 8

One month later, both Hank and Connor were completely bundled up even though “Yes, I know you may not need all these layers because you can make your senses duller than mine but… Jesus Christ, will you just put on the jacket?!” With their two healthy puppies in tow, they started off down the street, taking them for a quick walk. 

Breaking the comfortable silence that they often share, Hank nudged Connor’s arm with his elbow, “How would you feel about coming back onto the force? Fowler brought it up again the other day.”

Connor’s still present LED cycled from blue to yellow and back, quite a few times before settling somewhere in between. He knew that he was made to be a detective and he loved doing it, especially when he was with Hank but now that he was a deviant would he still be as good as he used to be? What if Hank got hurt? What if he got hurt? There was no coming back anymore. Dead meant dead now. 

Realizing that Hank was still waiting for his reply, Connor tried to sound as cheerful as he could, “I’d love to come back, I’m just concerned about my ability to complete our investigations. What if I’m not skilled enough?”

Hank chuckled remembering feeling the same way, “You may be a highly skilled android but you’re still a rookie. It will take you some time to really understand and become an effective detective.” Sensing that he hadn’t fully comforted his boyfriend, Hank put an arm around Connor’s shoulders and pulled him against his side, “I’ll be right there with you. I’m still your partner, Con. That’s not going to change.”

Interrupting them was a (still tiny) ball of golden fur jumping up at Connor’s legs. Daisy had grown from a sleepy newborn to a barely containable bundle of energy. 

Connor reached down and swung Daisy up in his arms, letting her attack his face with affectionate kisses. Hank smiled at them but felt the need to scold, “You spoil her. You won’t be able to pick her up and carry her around forever.” 

Still gushing over Daisy’s limitless cuteness, Connor pouted, “She’s tired.”

That made Hank roll his eyes in annoyance, “Yeah, she’s exhausted from chewing up all of our shit.” 

It’s true that maybe the puppy had a habit of destroying anything she could; shoes, clothes, sheets, pillows, leashes. Any and everything she could reach got tore up. But goddamn it, she was just so cute, neither of them could stay mad at her. Sumo tried to be a good babysitter but the poor guy only had so much energy. Connor placed her back on the ground, hoping that the exercise may calm her. Even though they all knew that no matter how much exercise she got, she’s only be quiet for a bit. And that is just the way they liked it.

Two days later, Connor was at the station, nervously tapping his fingers on his leg as he stared back at Captain Fowler who had an unreadable look on his face, “So… you want back in? You’re going to have to follow the same rules as everybody else. We’ll let you bypass college but you’re going to have to take a test and go through firearm training.”

At this point, Connor would do anything to have a job again so he eagerly agreed, “Yes, sir.”

As they started to close up their meeting, Fowler stopped Connor, “One more thing. You and Anderson… you’re living together?” 

Connor knew that could be meant in a platonic way but the look on Fowler’s face told him that the Captain didn’t mean it platonically. Nervously nodding, Connor agreed, hoping that it wasn’t going to be a problem.  
Very slowly, a large smile spread over Fowler’ usually stern, stressed features, “Good, you make sure to keep that old bastard in line.”

Connor smiled and shook Fowler’s outstretched hand, leaving his office after shutting the glass door behind him. He walked over to Hank’s desk where his boyfriend was waiting for him with an uneasy look on his face.   
As soon as Hank saw Connor he was on his feet, “So? How did it go? Are you back?”

Words seemed to fail Connor as he nodded with tears of joy in his eyes. He happily wrapped his arms around Hank’s soft stomach, feeling Hank bring his arms around him and tightly hug him back, “You and I will celebrate tonight.”

Stepping into their bubble of happiness, Detective Gavin Reed walked over with his usual unpleasantness, “Get a room, nobody wants to see that shit.” When Hank and Connor broke apart, Gavin took a large step towards Connor, getting up in the androids face, “I can’t believe they’re letting an iced out deviant be a detective.”

Hank quickly stepped between them, putting a strong and assertive hand on Gavin’s shoulder, forcing him away from Connor. He felt no guilt when he spat back, “They let you work here, dumb fuck.”

Turning his aggression towards Hank, Gavin pushed him back, drawing the attention of everyone in the bullpen, “Tell your little pet to stay out of my way, you washed up alcoholic.”

Connor wanted to scream, he wanted to push Gavin. No, he wanted to punch him. Nothing would have made him happier. He wanted to brag that Hank had been doing better with his drinking. He wanted to cry because Gavin knew he wanted Ice. But, he didn’t move fast enough to do any of that before Gavin walked away. 

With one of Hank’s warm, solid hands on his back, Connor let himself be led out of the station, still lost in his own thoughts. 

Once they got home, Connor finally started to relax; especially when Hank started to kiss him. Hank kissed low and needy, almost like he was just as desperate as Connor was. Neither of them could get enough of touching each other, getting lost in the feelings of pleasure and safety. 

Loving how light Connor is, Hank picked him up from under his thighs and carried him to their bedroom. After placing Connor on the bed, the android spoke up in a shy voice accompanied by a blue blush that spread over his cheeks, “I did something and I hope it’s not upsetting to you.”

“Con, when you say shit like that it scares the hell out of me.” Hank, obviously uneasy by Connor’s statement gave him weary eyes until Connor pulled off his shirt. 

“I read that some people enjoy certain garments on their partner so I purchased some to see if you liked them. If not, it’s okay.” Connor was sprawled out on the bed when he popped the button on his jeans and slid them off revealing a thin pair of satin baby blue panties stretched over his already hard cock that was leaking the slick synthetic gel that left a small wet spot on the fabric. As he pulled his jeans down further, Hank could see thin garters attached to stockings that ran from his feet up to his mid-thigh. The stockings were the same blue color as his panties and everything was outlined with delicate black lace.

Looking at Connor splayed out of his bed, looking like a goddamn snack, Hank’s mouth went dry and he got head rush with how fast the blood left his head. Words failed him as he started completely dumbfounded at his boyfriend. 

Beginning to grow uncomfortable at the silence, Connor squirmed and asked in a hushed voice, “Do you… like them?”

Still devouring Connor with his eyes, Hank barely rasps out, “Stand up.”

Wanting to make Hank happy, Connor obediently stood up and watched as Hank laid against his headrest and pillows. When Hank was comfortably lounging with his back reclined he smirked at the wet dream who was standing with his hands behind his back, nervously swaying back and forth. 

Still completely enamored with Connor, Hank decided to have some fun, “Come on, you wanted to dress like a dream. Why don’t you show off a little for me?” When Connor didn’t move, Hank knew he needed some instructions, “Take a deep breath and relax.” Once Connor’s shoulders relaxed, Hank pulled off his pants and shirt, “Good, turn around for me.”

Feeling better, Connor slowly turned around showing Hank how his muscular back tapered down into his thin waist. The silk and lace panties hugged his round, fit ass which was only accentuated by the thin garters. The see-through stockings proudly showed off his athletically sculpted legs. 

Needing some relief from his achingly hard cock, Hank pressed his palm against himself. Deciding he couldn’t wait to get his hands on Connor any longer, Hank grit out through clenched teeth, “Alright, enough fooling around. Get over here.”

As Connor turned back around to face Hank and seductively crawled between the older man’s legs, Hank had to bite the inside of his cheek very hard to avoid coming on the spot. With light touches, Connor traced his fingers up Hank’s naked body and whispered in his ear, “Will you eat me out before you fuck me, Lieutenant?”

Yep. That was the final straw. Hank grabbed Connor by his hips and flipped him over so he was lying face down in the pillows, “Who taught you to talk like that, huh?” Snaking his hands under Connor’s hips, Hank tugged them up, shoving Connor’s ass into the air.

Not being able to deny Connor anything, Hank opted to pull those thin panties to the side instead of taking them off before softly kissing Connor’s smooth, pale pink hole. 

The shiver that ran through Connor only prompted Hank to dive in and eat his ass like it was his last meal. At that moment, Connor was thanking whoever had the foresight to give him pleasure sensors because nothing could compare to the hot, slick warmth of Hank’s tongue pushing into him and teasing his rim. The android couldn’t stop his body’s self-lubricating mechanism from leaking copious amounts of fluid out of his tight hole, soaking Hank’s beard that was deliciously scratching against Connor’s soft thighs.

“H—Hank… please.” Connor’s voice sounded broken as he desperately clung to their bed sheets. When Hank didn’t change Connor whined louder, “Please, Hank! More… your fingers, your cock, anything.”

Needing his own release, Hank pushed two fingers into Connor quickly stretching him before moving so that the head of his thick cock lined up with Connor’s leaking hole. With one smooth movement, Hank fully pushed himself into Connor, his grip on the android’s hips tightening until his knuckles were white. 

Connor threw his head back and loudly moaned before starting to move his hips backward, fucking himself on Hank’s cock with enthusiasm.   
Trying to get some control back, Hank fucked Connor hard into the mattress until he was a mess of incoherent babbles and pleas, “Lieutenant… please. I want to come.”

Using one hand to grip onto Connor's hair and holding onto that fucking gorgeous lingerie with the other, Hank growled, “Go ahead, come on my cock.”

That was all Connor needed to hear before he was helplessly twitching as his orgasm ripped through him, spraying his inorganic semen onto the bedspread. 

Thankfully for Hank, his own orgasm came before he threw his back out. Once they were both fully spent, Hank flopped down beside Connor who looked sated and well-fucked.

Back in a normal state of mind, Hank now realized that Connor’s pretty lingerie was now wrinkled and unfortunately torn in many places. He traced his fingers over the abused fabric and apologetically kissed Connor’s cheek, “I’ll buy you more… whatever you want. Anything you want to keep you looking so pretty for me.”

Connor moved to face Hank and snuggled close to him, “Just for you, Hank.”


	9. Chapter 9

A few days later, Connor was sitting in solidarity with an electronic pad placed in front of him with the long, tedious, difficult test in front of him. Even for an android with a super brain, the test proved to be a challenge. 

Once he knew he passed, it didn’t take Connor long to be accepted back onto the force. Finally, he had something to do. Finally, Connor could throw himself back into cases and investigation. Finally, he wasn’t useless. 

That night after returning home, Hank was cooking in the kitchen while Connor made sure he had enough clothes for work. As he dug through their closet, he pulled a small box out of the back of the closet. As his curiosity got the better of him, Connor sat on the edge of the bed and carefully lifted the lid off of the dusty box.

Inside there were many pictures of a young boy with light brown hair and sweet eyes. Some pictures had a kind looking woman and a young, handsome man that Connor recognized as Hank. The pictures ranged from the boy swaddled as a baby, to the child playing baseball. Accompanied by the photos, were a pair of tiny blue baby-sized socks, a child’s drawing of Hank and the young boy. Connor quickly put the pieces together that this was Cole. He was lost in his thoughts of how happy Hank looked when he heard Hank clear his throat, “What are you doing?”

Connor jumped, his eyes quickly flying up to Hank’s as he stuttered, “I’m sorry, Hank. I found this box and I was curious. I didn’t mean to invade your privacy.”

Hank sadly chuckled and shook his head, walking over to the bed to sit next to Connor, gently taking the box from him, “Con, this is your house now. Don’t worry about privacy. I guess I should probably tell you a little bit about him. My ex-wife and I had Cole early before we were even married. His mother, Emma, was a nice lady but she and I just didn’t work out and when Cole died we had no reason to stay together. He was six when he died… he would have just turned nine. He was so bright and cheerful; one of the sweetest kids I’d ever met. He was perfect.”

Connor carefully listened as Hank opened up about his son when he stopped talking Connor rested his head on Hank’s shoulder. He said the only thing he could think of, “I’m so sorry you lost him. I would have loved to meet him.”

Hank smiled and hugged Connor close against his side, “You two would have been such a handful. God… I can only imagine the damage you would have caused together.”

Connor smiled along with Hank and enjoyed the moment together. Connor studied the far-off but happy look on Hank’s face; he wished more than anything he could bring Cole back. 

Hank was the one who closed the box but instead of putting it back in the closet, he decided to place it on their shared dresser after brushing the dust off of it. Hank walked back over to Connor and shrugged at the inquisitive look on Connor’s face, “It hurts that he’s gone but he shouldn’t be locked away. If that’s okay with you.”

Connor bounced to his feet and tightly wrapped his arms around Hank’s soft waist, “I think that’s a great idea.”  
They turned in early that night as the next day was Connor’s first day back at the station. Unfortunately for them, the case that landed on their desk was a Red Ice dealer who kidnapped androids to use their Thirium to make the drug.

After reviewing the facts, they headed to the house to look for evidence so they can build a strong case against the sick drug dealer. The house was a rundown, tiny home but the inside was gut-wrenching; android parts strewn around on the floor, jars of blue blood on all the shelves, the surgical tools, the bags, and pipes were sickening to Connor who started to feel extremely uncomfortable in the house. Then he noticed the Ice rocks sitting on the kitchen table, Connor subconsciously started walking towards it, needing to dull the pain of seeing these androids mutilated for pleasure. He knew that by doing Ice, he was supporting the slaughterhouse he was standing in but all of the officers and lights and forensic personnel faded away as Connor’s feet carried him towards the Ice. 

Before he could reach out and grab it, Hanks hand wrapped around his upper arm and tugged him close enough to whisper in his ear, quiet enough that nobody else could hear them, “Walk away from it.”

Connor quickly looked up at Hank’s eyes before looking back at the drugs, “But—”

Tightening his grip on his boyfriend Hank’s voice got sterner, “No. Either walk away or go sit in the car.”

He didn’t want to but Connor leaned closer, his fingers shaking with the need. All he could think about was feeling that high again, nothing else mattered at that moment, “I want it, just a little.”

Disbelief and anger flashed across Hank’s face as he roughly pulled Connor out of the building, muttering under his breath, “Are you fucking kidding me?”

Once they were in the car, away from the lights and loud crowds. Hank took Connor’s face in his hands, forcing him to make eye contact, “Do you remember what I said to you? I need you. I love you, Con. So please, I’m begging you. No more drugs, please.”

With the last bit of fight in him dying, Connor tried one more time, “Hank—”

Hank’s blue eyes pleaded with him, “Please, Connor. You love me too, right?” 

Of course, he does. He loves him more than anything but the horrible part inside of him screamed that he needed the drugs. All of Connor’s energy went to focusing on Hank, “Of course, I love you.”

Obviously relaxing, Hank moved his right hand from holding Connor’s cheek to stroke it through his hair, “Thank you. Now, are you going to stay in the car or do you think you can control yourself?”

Connor looked down in shame and barely whispered, “I’ll stay.” 

Hank quickly drew his hands away from Connor and scoffed, shaking his head. He got out of the car without another word. 

An hour later, they were sitting at the station logging in evidence in the uncomfortable, deadly silence. Not a word was spoken between them at the station or on the drive home. Once they were home, they said a quick hello to the two excited pups. 

Connor let out the dogs into the backyard while Hank started to make dinner. Halfway through cooking dinner, Hank had two fuzzy floor cleaners waiting by his feet. When he was done cooking he turned around expecting to see Connor at the table or sitting on the couch but when Hank looked for him, he was nowhere to be seen. 

Frustrated but still worried, Hank went look for him. When he found him, Connor was curled up in bed with his back to the door; through the dark, Hank could see his LED a steady dark red. Sighing, Hank quietly walked away but not before sending Sumo and Daisy up onto the bed. 

After eating and showering, Hank quietly crawled onto his side of the bed. Sumo was sprawled out at the foot of the bed with Daisy snoozing curled up against his stomach. Connor’s back was still facing Hank but he was still awake with his face buried in his pillow. 

The air between them was still thick and stressed, disregarding that, Hank kissed Connor’s head and whispered a soft goodnight before turning away from him. 

After ten minutes of dead silence, Connor rolled over toward Hank and snuggled against his back. His voice shook like static, “I’m sorry… I’m trying.”

Hank immediately felt like an asshole, turning back toward Connor, he wrapped his arms around Connor holding him close, “I know you are and I know that you’re experiencing lots of things for time first time but this? Ice is something you do not need to experience. In your case, more than once. Do you remember what happened to Cole? I lost him to that shit. Don’t make me lose you too.”

Connor turned off the outer-skin of his hands and slid them under Hank’s shirt, truly feeling him as he tightly hugged him, “I’m sorry, Hank. I don’t know what I’ve been thinking.”

Hank could feel the change of Connor’s hands but ignored it as he was used to it at this point, knowing that it helped Connor actually feel everything and calm down, “It’s okay, Con. That shit messes with your head. We’ll get you fixed up, I promise.”


	10. Chapter 10

Hank woke up with a scream, successfully waking Connor up out of stasis. He sat straight up, taking shallow, ragged breaths; nothing felt real until he felt Connor’s hand on his back and the other on his forearm. Connor’s soft familiar voice barely registered over the pounding in Hank’s head, “You’re okay, it’s just a nightmare.”

Feeling the bile crawl up his throat, Hank quickly got to his feet and stumbled to the bathroom before throwing up. Connor stayed in their room, sitting cross-legged on the bed waiting for Hank. He knew that Hank didn’t want Connor to see him be sick. 

When Hank came back to bed his skin was pale and his t-shirt was slightly damp with sweat. He took a shaky breath out and tried to get comfortable against the pillows, “Shit… I’m sorry. I just had a bad dream.”

Connor strongly held Hank’s hand, threading their fingers together, “Would you like to talk about it?” After a pause, he asked in a cautiously quiet voice, “Was it about Cole?”

Hank wants to dismiss him but he was just so tired. Too tired to fight, too tired to deny it, too tired to not tell Connor everything. He looked up at his love with a broken look in his blue eyes, his voice breaking, “He was my boy and he just left. He died and it wasn’t fair. It wasn’t fucking fair.”

This was the first time in their relationship that Hank really cried. Through his sobs, Hank clung to Connor, desperate for the comfort the android brought him. While holding onto Connor, Hank desperately looked at him, “Please, don’t go.”

All Connor could do was hold Hank and try to calm him, “I am never going anywhere. You’ve done things for me nobody else ever would have. You’re everything to me.” 

As Hank’s sobs began to subside, they laid down together with Hank’s head in Connor’s chest, they kept their arms around each other, silently begging the other not to leave. Connor softly kissed Hank’s head and whispered, “Rest, Hank. I’ll be here when you wake up.”

And he was. The next morning when Hank woke up after his much-needed sleep, he opened his eyes to see Sumo and Daisy playing at the foot of the bed. Daisy was playfully biting Sumo’s large paws while the older dog boofed at her. 

Rolling over to face Connor, Hank smiled at the sight of Connor surrounded by three of the four pillows on their bed and hoarding most of the blanket. He was lying face down in the comfortable pillows when his LED circled and blinked blue as he opened his eyes. With a completely love-drunk expression on his face, Connor smiled, “Good morning, Hank.”

Still half-asleep, Hank mumbled back, “Morning, you.” He had about three feet of room on his side of the bed, one pillow, a corner of the comforter, two dogs pushing his feet, and a boyfriend who was a morning person already moving somehow. Despite how painful some nights were, the mornings always seem brighter. 

Connor crawled into Hank’s lap with his boxers riding up on his fit thighs and his tank top showing off his gorgeous body. Hank’s large hands found their favorite spot on Connor’s hips as Connor leaned forward and slowly brought their lips together, resting his hands on Hank’s soft sides, appreciating the older man’s plush but attractive stomach. 

Before things could get heated that early in the morning, Connor slightly pulled away and bumped their noses together before whispering, “We have to be at the station soon.”

Hank chuckled and possessively tightened his arms around Connor, playfully teasing him, “We need to work on your pillow talk.” He started to kiss Connor’s neck at the sensitive spot under his ear where his wires were more exposed.

Connor squirmed and chastised him, “Hank… no.”

Being a grump, Hank pouted and poked at Connor’s sides, “For a deviant, you’re no fun.”

Wanting to make Hank happy again, Connor kissed his cheek and with innocently smiled while not-so-innocently saying, “I promise when we get home I’ll let you fuck me any way you want…” Leaning forward, he gently bit Hank’s earlobe and whispered, “…anyway you want.”

While Hank laid on the bed shocked-still, Connor jumped off of him and jogged into the kitchen, laughing to himself. Once Hank shook off the feeling of arousal in his gut, he chased after Connor, yelling down the hall, “You little shit, get back here!”

With both of the dogs at his feet, Hank walked into the kitchen grabbing Connor from around the waist, taking him away from the coffee maker (which he was so lovingly starting for Hank). Placing Connor on the kitchen table, Hank kissed those giggles right off his face. The sound of the old coffee maker still trying its best broke them apart. Hank looked into Connor’s sweet eyes and smiled, “Come on, let’s get ready for work. Fowler is going to have our asses if we are late.”

Sliding off the counter, Connor started to feed the puppies, “Of course, Lieutenant.”

Hank just shook his head and poured himself a cup of coffee, shaking his head and laughing, “Oh, you’re really going to get it later.” Even though he spoke a big game, Hank knew that Connor had him wrapped around his finger. Just the way they both liked it and intended on keeping it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, so this fic was supposed to be better written, more detailed, longer and have a better plot but unfortunately I'm having some health and personal problems. I know that this last chapter may seem a little rushed and poorly written. I wanted to wrap up this story as best as I could. I apologize for the ending, thank you for reading! xx


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